So the eagerly awaited fixture between Shoreham and ACME came around yet again and with Captain Pat out of action the captaincy fell to vice-captain Jack Rivett. In true captain’s fashion Jack managed to miss the toss but in his absence Shoreham won the toss and elected to field with foreshadowing from the changing room: “We may manage to get one more losing draw this season!”

Both teams took to the field with ten players and both were concerned as the missing Shoreham player was responsible for the teas: Richard Nash. Luckily Richard turned up a couple of overs in by which point Mazzon had already taken the wicket of Johnson for a duck. He (7-4-10-1) and Joel Hewett (6-0-39-1) opened the bowling well each taking a wicket. Joel’s came in his final over in which he bowled two beamers at the batsman’s head followed by a slower ball which cut down the hill which the batsman wrongly decided to leave. He was replaced by George Rivett (6-0-35-1) who gave Styles his second catch of the game at slip whilst Mazzon was replaced by Setterfield (4-0-34-0) at the pavilion end. Fifth and Sixth change bowlers were Captain Jack (7-0-45-2) and Raymondo (6-0-25-0) who each threatened the batsmen in their own way. The breakthrough came when the two teamed up. Captain Jack forced a mistake from Suua (71) who looped one up behind Raymondo at gully who pirouetted perfectly to pouch the catch. Jack was also supported from a catch by Haysler at keeper. George Stacey (1-0-11-0) took the final over before ACME declared on 213-5. Special mention should go to Nash and Hewett who each ran up and down the boundaries all innings.

After a fantastic tea, it was ACME’s turn to take to the field with Haysler (7) and Styles (13) opening. After the first over, Shoreham were looking good at 7-0 but the run rate slowed due to very tight bowling and when Haysler lost his middle stump, Setterfield was brought to the crease. Danny produced yet another fine innings ending on a tragically close 49 and he was ably assisted by Nash (30), Raymondo (20) and finally George Stacey who spent most of the innings telling anyone who would listen how he couldn’t bat and then produced the second highest score of the innings of 32 in about 25 balls! Joel (4*) and Dan James (4) saw out the final over of the innings to end on 164-8. It was another losing draw to add to the collection and it was immediately celebrated at the pub with many beers but more importantly many bowls of chips…

- George Rivett

It seems rumours of Buckhurst’s demise were premature. There they were, large as life – the same familiar faces and the same names on the shirts – Axtel, Drown and Riley. J Simmonds was there too. No, not the beauty who played Kirk Douglas’ wife in Spartacus, nor the blood-spitting, fire-breathing and tongue-wagging front man from Kiss. Only the team’s name was new – Penshurst Bucks – much posher.

Shoreham’s skipper continued his winning form – well, as far as the toss is concerned, and Shoreham took to the field.

The Bucks’ reputation for big hitting is legendary, so the addition of first- team bowler Gary Hukins and Lemmings opening bowler James Baker (guest-starring for the day) were much appreciated. Both bowled tightly to keep the run rate below 3 an over in their spells.

Opener J. Drown stepped across a straight one from Gary and was given out for only 6 runs. The Shoreham skipper, fielding at short mid-on, provided a rare on-field contribution by taking a sharp one-handed catch off a well struck drive from Bucks’ captain Sharp (20). Jack Rivett juggled a similarly well hit shot from R. Axtel (12) at mid wicket. Leppard (16) missed a straight one from Ray which would surely have landed in the next parish had he connected. Ray then dismissed N. Riley (1) lbw. Jack got his 2nd wicket bowling J. Simmonds (18). James Baker took the catch of the day with a spectacular dive at cover off Paul Styles’ bowling, dismissing D. Riley (24). Dan James’ eventful over saw S. Axtel caught and bowled for 16 runs – most of them scored off the very same over. James Baker finished off the Bucks’ 10 men taking an easy chance at square leg from Bob Stacey’s 2nd over.

The Bucks had scored 113 runs but Shoreham sportingly provided 29 extras to boost the visitors’ total to 142.

A special mention is deserved for Harry Stacey, who shared fielding duties with his dad and very nearly got 2 run-outs.

A delicious early tea from Cath Styles was leisurely enjoyed, during which Harry defected to the opposition.

Shoreham’s opening batsmen Haysler and Styles took to the field and steadily took to the bowling. Alex practised his two favourite shots – the square cut and the guide down to third man – a less than brilliantly executed example of the latter seeing him caught at slip on a promising 27. Paul batted well and proved his sprightliness by running a 3, eventually falling lbw after a useful 25. Ray succumbed first ball to a great delivery from D. Riley, which swung away then seamed down the hill to remove the left hander’s off-stump. George Stacey played a cameo role as the third member of the family to grace the field, bringing Kumar to the crease. Kumar’s innings (30) was easily the most entertaining, not just for the 6 fours (3 of them in consecutive balls off the hapless Sharp), but also because he had the honour of becoming Harry Stacey’s first ever wicket in adult cricket.

The victory was completed by Gary Hukins who, after seeing off D. Riley’s hat-trick ball, played a cultured innings of 28 not out.

Well done all.

- Pat

Both Saturday teams had been victorious, and the drink had flowed late into the night at The George. Surely we couldn’t do the treble? The best results the Sunday captain had achieved so far in the season were draws – the only win had been guest-skippered by his illustrious predecessor, Sean Bromfield.

For once, the whole team arrived on time for the 2 o’clock kick- off. But where were the oppo? Had our old rivals bottled it? The two fixture secretaries would later dispute the discrepancy. So it was that after more than an hour in the sweltering sun, the cruel skipper sent in his attack, having won the toss.

Both openers bowled tightly, which was just as well considering the state of both the outfield and the fielders. Ed toiled with a bleeding foot without reward, bowling his 7 overs for only 25 runs. Russell seemed to amaze himself by bowling opening batsman N Leach and conceding only 21 runs in his 7 overs. Greg put in probably his best ever bowling performance, taking 2 wickets – including clean-bowling danger man Grove on 2. His 5 overs cost a miserly 15 runs – most of them coming from his last, exhausted over. But surely the pick of the bowlers was first-change Alex Mazzon, whose figures read 7 overs, 2 maidens, 2 for 13.

With time and wickets running out for Otford in their 35 over innings, it was looking like a walkover was on the cards, so Shoreham’s skipper sportingly decided to spread the bowling around. The effect was predictable, and Otford accelerated to finish on 152 for 7 at tea.

In order to preserve some of his more valuable batsmen, skipper Barrett bravely took to the field with a broken big-toe, a relic from a vicious yorker 2 weeks previously. His history of duck making is, of course, legendary, but so far the Diamond Duck had eluded him. No longer.

He was replaced by Bharat, Walker, Kumar and Brooks who between them managed to advance the score by a whopping 5 runs. Russell even had the decency to get a Golden Duck in order to share the skipper’s embarrassment.

The Chairman and other luminaries looked on in horror as the drama unfolded. They could not understand the high spirits which the team continued to demonstrate. The pile of empty lager cans should have been a clue.

Cometh the Hour, Cometh the Man, and while everyone around him was losing theirs, opener Mark Richardson was steadily accumulating runs and clichés from the onlookers. A useful partnership with the plucky Joel Hewett put us back in the hunt. Joel departed on 20, bringing man of the day Greg Taylor to the crease. With plenty of overs and daylight to spare Mark and Greg smashed their way to victory, every blow cheered by the increasingly enthusiastic pavilion. Both finished not out on 76 and 30 respectively.

So to The Crown to celebrate what had looked like an unlikely treble and to laud the day’s heroes. Dan serenaded us on the cello and we clapped each other jovially on the back.

And the Man of the Day? Well, sadly Blythe missed both Greg’s bowling and batting performances. When informed by text, she replied: “Damn, I wish I’d left earlier!”

- Pat

If you ever visit Outwood, it’s worth the detour, but don’t travel by convoy with a bus driver who doesn’t exceed speed limits and a retired postman whose right knee won’t let him push down on the accelerator pedal.  When we eventually got there another toss was lost by the visiting captain, meaning Shoreham’s second-stringers were consigned to an afternoon chasing leather into the National Trust woods that surround the ground.

The opening attack of Ed Walker and Bob Shapter was challenged by Outwood’s experienced opening pair, Ed’s flowing hair disproving the Samson theory of longer = stronger, and Bob’s increasing lack of hair demonstrating that wisdom does come with age, as he happily agreed to concentrate on his fielding after 4 overs.  It took the introduction of Nick Walker and Jackson Rivett to slow the run rate down from 7 to 5 an over and they both bowled uninterrupted spells: 9-43-1 and 9-53-2 respectively.  Shoreham’s ground fielding in the main was quite tidy and everyone worked hard all afternoon, though the hard and bumpy outfield proved a friend to the batsmen in both innings.  But our catching was less than immaculate – both openers were dropped before they reached 50, one of them going on to score 121.  Jack, Willy Westacott and Bob Shapter did eventually hold onto catches, following their earlier transgressions; but our wicket-keeper unfortunately failed to bag a top edged skier – indeed he never saw it until it plopped on the ground  5 feet behind him.  A former full-back for Sevenoaks 1st XV failed to hold on to a lofted off drive as well… but enough said.

Alex Hofmann made a tidy, if somewhat petulant, contribution at the death, and both openers came back respectably in their second spells.  Even the wicket keeper made amends with a well judged throw for a run out at the bowler’s end to grab a precious bowling point.  The verdict as we headed for an excellent tea was that we had probably got off lightly with Outwood on 260-6 at the close.

After tea, Bob the bus-driver was soon back in the garage after shuffling across his stumps.  And then all hell broke loose.  Nick Pearce, who had already showed his attacking intentions, was joined by Will Stanyard, who, after a couple of streaky opening salvoes, swiftly got into his stride.  Outwood’s opening bowlers were taken apart, as 117 runs came from the first 10 overs.  Will reached 50 in 8 overs and Nick, who hit the longest of sixes over the pavilion, managed his shortly afterwards.  But as suddenly as it had started,  it was all over.  Both batsmen departed for 57 and we returned to the sedate accumulation method preferred by Bob Shapter, and Nick Walker.  They managed to keep the target at 5 runs an over until the 200 was passed, when Nick showed a remarkable lack of judgement and pace in running himself out and Bob executed an air shot.  With 10 overs and 5 wickets remaining, the 50 or so runs needed seemed gettable, but there were to be more victims yet.  Paul looked comfortable in his first innings for 10 months, Ed smacked a couple of boundaries and Willy Westacott looked as though he would see it through.  However all three flattered to deceive and it was left to a heartstopping finale with Alex getting back in the swing (10 not out) and Josh Westacott (13 not out) showing remarkable aplomb and winning the game with a six over the pavilion roof.  How cool is that?  264-8 off 38.1 overs, following last weeks 240-3 of 37.  Things are looking up for Shoreham’s 2nd team as well as its 1st team.

Keep ‘em coming…

- Nick W

Shoreham 1st XI - 231-3
Hadlow 1st XI – 38 All Out

Shoreham earned only their third victory of the season with an emphatic win over Hadlow on Saturday, spearheaded by an All-Star performance by Captain James Trick. Shoreham started the day by winning the toss and electing to bat in extreme heat with Andrew Monteith and James Trick opening the batting. The away side got off a scorching start racing to 27 from the first 3 overs before Hadlow settled into their rhythm to claw the run-rate back. Portlock (8-44-0) and Blacklee (9-30-1) bowled economically in the soaring temperatures but it was the introduction of Wash (9-34-1) to the attack that earned Hadlow their first wicket when Monteith was bowled for 18 in the 13th over. The opening pair shared a stand of 73 before Monteith departed with J. Trick looking comfortable at the crease with 43 already to his name. Tim Waymouth came in at three for Shoreham, finding it difficult with the Hadlow bowlers bowling well and he departed for 7 when bowled by Blacklee. However J. Trick was settled in at the other end and had eased past his half century punishing the few loose balls on offer. Sam Trick came in at four with the Shoreham innings needing some rebuilding and had to dig in in the testing conditions. J. and S. Trick batted conservatively with the aim of putting Shoreham in a comfortable position to accelerate the run rate in the final ten overs with the score on 141-2. The third wicket partnership of 115 was finally broken in the 39th over with S. Trick departing for 33 to the bowling of Millen (4-44-1). This bought Phil Edge (17*) to the crease and powerful hitting by himself and J. Trick in the final over and a half saw Shoreham post a score of 231-3 in 40 overs. J. Trick lead from the front and carried his bat ending with 121* to his name.

J. Trick still numb with adrenaline from his batting display took the decision to take the new ball, a decision that looked questionable when Wash (8) dispatched his first two balls for 4’s. But when J. Trick’s third ball ducked in and took the inside edge of Wash’s bat through to the keeper it was evident it was his day. J. Trick’s opening spell of pace bowling left some of the Hadlow batsmen bamboozled with the ball both swinging away and seaming back, tearing through the home side’s top order with figures of 9-16-5. Trick was ably assisted by Nigel Jeffrey who got in on the act taking three wickets for 19 runs from 8 overs; J. Trick never out of the action also took the catch for Jeffrey’s first wicket. Robert Stacey (0.4-0-2) then entered the attack to take the glory of claiming the final two wickets of the Hadlow innings one with his first ball and the second with his fourth. On a day where almost everything went Shoreham’s way an impressive fielding display yielded catches for Andrew Montgomerie and Phil Edge, however the plaudits go to James Trick who put in a captains performance leading Shoreham with both Bat and Ball with Hadlow bowled out for 38 in the 18th over.

- Sam

There could hardly have been a greater contrast in weather conditions than between the first day of the season, when we stood blue lipped, wet and miserable in Luddesdowne’s outfield, and this Saturday when we were slowly microwaved on our own ground.

Fielding first, again, we opened from the pavilion end with the returning Ed Walker. Fresh from his art show, hair streaming even further than before, Ed gave a performance that was, according to critics, somewhere between the impressionistic and surreal. It was well received by Luddesdowne’s openers and the score mounted rapidly. Change was obviously required and so we shifted from surrealism to dada. Old Father Nick proceeded to calm things down with a long, economical spell.

Meanwhile Bob Shapter bowled a few tidy overs, and then the first change at his end proved productive. Wyn’s incredibly deceptive, really slow ball struck the batsman’s pads and whilst the result of a polite lbw appeal was being deliberated Will Stanyard whipped off the bails and there was no doubt about the stumping. Nick removed Luddesdowne’s number 3 and a few overs later Wyn was indebted to Dan James for a boundary catch that removed the next man in.

A long stand then followed that was only broken by Ed’s return. Four down was all that we could manage, despite the further efforts of Bob, Ed, Jon and Chris (now figuring in the traditional, second team, one-over, strike bowler role). Luddesdowne’s early charge had been reined in but they still put together a total of 244.

Alex and Wyn opened for Shoreham, and though they set a lively pace both were soon back in the pavilion, Wyn for 6 and Alex for 14. Then came the defining partnership of the day, dominated by Will with a solid supporting role from Nick. We would have been at the George possibly half an hour earlier had Will not cleared the fence with such regularity. (Without the pre-season clearance work we would probably have run out of balls). Will took a pretty friendly Luddesdowne attack to the cleaners, finally falling when there was less than 50 to get at around three an over.

At this point Bob came out to join Nick. In a different season there would have been little tension, with wickets and overs in hand. This season – having yet to win – there was a certain frisson of anxiety around the pavilion. In the middle, Bob was at his most phlegmatic and, almost glacially, he and Nick advanced the score. Bob was quite resolute in dealing with Nick’s calling and on the one occasion when he was forced into running against his better judgement Luddesdowne obliged with some fielding that was possibly born of shared incredulity. A final boundary pushed the score to 247 with 4 overs to spare.

A very enjoyable afternoon’s cricket, played in a great spirit, finished with the right result as far as we were concerned, balancing our defeat back at the beginning of May. We look forward to meeting Luddesdowne next year.

Nick Pearce did not score in this game but would probably like a mention.

- Wyn

It was the inaugural fixture between Shoreham and Matfield Green and most of the side turned up with only 5 minutes to spare thanks to lateness, a lack of petrol and dodgy directions. Captain Barrett lost the toss and Shoreham were put into bat which very rarely happens… and we were about to be reminded why. The opening partnership of Ray Trick and Bob Sims put on 17 before Bob was bowled without scoring by the opener Wright. Wright tore through the Shoreham batting taking 5 wickets for only 14 runs including a triple wicket maiden. Ray finished on 64 and the only other telling contributions were made by Mr Extras who got 20 and Pat who got 4 and a broken toe for his troubles. Shoreham finished on 102 all out after 27.4 overs and were out fielding again before tea.

A lesser team may have been disheartened having put on such a low total but the Sunday side took it in their stride and the sprit was quite jovial in the field. Nigel Jeffrey (8-0-27-0) opened the bowling with Ray (5-0-29-2) and each did their part in keeping the run rate down as well as teaming up to dislodge opener Gilbert bowled Trick caught Jeffrey. Brad Sims was the honorary wicketkeeper for the day but had to leave the field with a suspected broken finger after a fast paced Jeffrey delivery. George Rivett (2-0-8-1) and Greg Taylor (1-0-4-0) took over proceedings and kept the rate low. Kumar (1-0-20-0) and Pat (0.3-0-4-0) finished off the innings with a flourish as Matfield Green reached the total with a good 20 overs to spare and 7 wickets in hand. However, the ground had very good links to the pub which was only a 2 minute walk away. So, the team moved to the pub to nurse their various injuries and for the 4 ducks of the day to drink from the duck cup!

NB Bob’s Duck was mentioned in the report because there was no picture of him!

- George