Both Saturday teams had been victorious, and the drink had flowed late into the night at The George. Surely we couldn’t do the treble? The best results the Sunday captain had achieved so far in the season were draws – the only win had been guest-skippered by his illustrious predecessor, Sean Bromfield.

For once, the whole team arrived on time for the 2 o’clock kick- off. But where were the oppo? Had our old rivals bottled it? The two fixture secretaries would later dispute the discrepancy. So it was that after more than an hour in the sweltering sun, the cruel skipper sent in his attack, having won the toss.

Both openers bowled tightly, which was just as well considering the state of both the outfield and the fielders. Ed toiled with a bleeding foot without reward, bowling his 7 overs for only 25 runs. Russell seemed to amaze himself by bowling opening batsman N Leach and conceding only 21 runs in his 7 overs. Greg put in probably his best ever bowling performance, taking 2 wickets – including clean-bowling danger man Grove on 2. His 5 overs cost a miserly 15 runs – most of them coming from his last, exhausted over. But surely the pick of the bowlers was first-change Alex Mazzon, whose figures read 7 overs, 2 maidens, 2 for 13.

With time and wickets running out for Otford in their 35 over innings, it was looking like a walkover was on the cards, so Shoreham’s skipper sportingly decided to spread the bowling around. The effect was predictable, and Otford accelerated to finish on 152 for 7 at tea.

In order to preserve some of his more valuable batsmen, skipper Barrett bravely took to the field with a broken big-toe, a relic from a vicious yorker 2 weeks previously. His history of duck making is, of course, legendary, but so far the Diamond Duck had eluded him. No longer.

He was replaced by Bharat, Walker, Kumar and Brooks who between them managed to advance the score by a whopping 5 runs. Russell even had the decency to get a Golden Duck in order to share the skipper’s embarrassment.

The Chairman and other luminaries looked on in horror as the drama unfolded. They could not understand the high spirits which the team continued to demonstrate. The pile of empty lager cans should have been a clue.

Cometh the Hour, Cometh the Man, and while everyone around him was losing theirs, opener Mark Richardson was steadily accumulating runs and clichés from the onlookers. A useful partnership with the plucky Joel Hewett put us back in the hunt. Joel departed on 20, bringing man of the day Greg Taylor to the crease. With plenty of overs and daylight to spare Mark and Greg smashed their way to victory, every blow cheered by the increasingly enthusiastic pavilion. Both finished not out on 76 and 30 respectively.

So to The Crown to celebrate what had looked like an unlikely treble and to laud the day’s heroes. Dan serenaded us on the cello and we clapped each other jovially on the back.

And the Man of the Day? Well, sadly Blythe missed both Greg’s bowling and batting performances. When informed by text, she replied: “Damn, I wish I’d left earlier!”

- Pat

If you ever visit Outwood, it’s worth the detour, but don’t travel by convoy with a bus driver who doesn’t exceed speed limits and a retired postman whose right knee won’t let him push down on the accelerator pedal.  When we eventually got there another toss was lost by the visiting captain, meaning Shoreham’s second-stringers were consigned to an afternoon chasing leather into the National Trust woods that surround the ground.

The opening attack of Ed Walker and Bob Shapter was challenged by Outwood’s experienced opening pair, Ed’s flowing hair disproving the Samson theory of longer = stronger, and Bob’s increasing lack of hair demonstrating that wisdom does come with age, as he happily agreed to concentrate on his fielding after 4 overs.  It took the introduction of Nick Walker and Jackson Rivett to slow the run rate down from 7 to 5 an over and they both bowled uninterrupted spells: 9-43-1 and 9-53-2 respectively.  Shoreham’s ground fielding in the main was quite tidy and everyone worked hard all afternoon, though the hard and bumpy outfield proved a friend to the batsmen in both innings.  But our catching was less than immaculate – both openers were dropped before they reached 50, one of them going on to score 121.  Jack, Willy Westacott and Bob Shapter did eventually hold onto catches, following their earlier transgressions; but our wicket-keeper unfortunately failed to bag a top edged skier – indeed he never saw it until it plopped on the ground  5 feet behind him.  A former full-back for Sevenoaks 1st XV failed to hold on to a lofted off drive as well… but enough said.

Alex Hofmann made a tidy, if somewhat petulant, contribution at the death, and both openers came back respectably in their second spells.  Even the wicket keeper made amends with a well judged throw for a run out at the bowler’s end to grab a precious bowling point.  The verdict as we headed for an excellent tea was that we had probably got off lightly with Outwood on 260-6 at the close.

After tea, Bob the bus-driver was soon back in the garage after shuffling across his stumps.  And then all hell broke loose.  Nick Pearce, who had already showed his attacking intentions, was joined by Will Stanyard, who, after a couple of streaky opening salvoes, swiftly got into his stride.  Outwood’s opening bowlers were taken apart, as 117 runs came from the first 10 overs.  Will reached 50 in 8 overs and Nick, who hit the longest of sixes over the pavilion, managed his shortly afterwards.  But as suddenly as it had started,  it was all over.  Both batsmen departed for 57 and we returned to the sedate accumulation method preferred by Bob Shapter, and Nick Walker.  They managed to keep the target at 5 runs an over until the 200 was passed, when Nick showed a remarkable lack of judgement and pace in running himself out and Bob executed an air shot.  With 10 overs and 5 wickets remaining, the 50 or so runs needed seemed gettable, but there were to be more victims yet.  Paul looked comfortable in his first innings for 10 months, Ed smacked a couple of boundaries and Willy Westacott looked as though he would see it through.  However all three flattered to deceive and it was left to a heartstopping finale with Alex getting back in the swing (10 not out) and Josh Westacott (13 not out) showing remarkable aplomb and winning the game with a six over the pavilion roof.  How cool is that?  264-8 off 38.1 overs, following last weeks 240-3 of 37.  Things are looking up for Shoreham’s 2nd team as well as its 1st team.

Keep ‘em coming…

- Nick W

Shoreham 1st XI - 231-3
Hadlow 1st XI – 38 All Out

Shoreham earned only their third victory of the season with an emphatic win over Hadlow on Saturday, spearheaded by an All-Star performance by Captain James Trick. Shoreham started the day by winning the toss and electing to bat in extreme heat with Andrew Monteith and James Trick opening the batting. The away side got off a scorching start racing to 27 from the first 3 overs before Hadlow settled into their rhythm to claw the run-rate back. Portlock (8-44-0) and Blacklee (9-30-1) bowled economically in the soaring temperatures but it was the introduction of Wash (9-34-1) to the attack that earned Hadlow their first wicket when Monteith was bowled for 18 in the 13th over. The opening pair shared a stand of 73 before Monteith departed with J. Trick looking comfortable at the crease with 43 already to his name. Tim Waymouth came in at three for Shoreham, finding it difficult with the Hadlow bowlers bowling well and he departed for 7 when bowled by Blacklee. However J. Trick was settled in at the other end and had eased past his half century punishing the few loose balls on offer. Sam Trick came in at four with the Shoreham innings needing some rebuilding and had to dig in in the testing conditions. J. and S. Trick batted conservatively with the aim of putting Shoreham in a comfortable position to accelerate the run rate in the final ten overs with the score on 141-2. The third wicket partnership of 115 was finally broken in the 39th over with S. Trick departing for 33 to the bowling of Millen (4-44-1). This bought Phil Edge (17*) to the crease and powerful hitting by himself and J. Trick in the final over and a half saw Shoreham post a score of 231-3 in 40 overs. J. Trick lead from the front and carried his bat ending with 121* to his name.

J. Trick still numb with adrenaline from his batting display took the decision to take the new ball, a decision that looked questionable when Wash (8) dispatched his first two balls for 4’s. But when J. Trick’s third ball ducked in and took the inside edge of Wash’s bat through to the keeper it was evident it was his day. J. Trick’s opening spell of pace bowling left some of the Hadlow batsmen bamboozled with the ball both swinging away and seaming back, tearing through the home side’s top order with figures of 9-16-5. Trick was ably assisted by Nigel Jeffrey who got in on the act taking three wickets for 19 runs from 8 overs; J. Trick never out of the action also took the catch for Jeffrey’s first wicket. Robert Stacey (0.4-0-2) then entered the attack to take the glory of claiming the final two wickets of the Hadlow innings one with his first ball and the second with his fourth. On a day where almost everything went Shoreham’s way an impressive fielding display yielded catches for Andrew Montgomerie and Phil Edge, however the plaudits go to James Trick who put in a captains performance leading Shoreham with both Bat and Ball with Hadlow bowled out for 38 in the 18th over.

- Sam

There could hardly have been a greater contrast in weather conditions than between the first day of the season, when we stood blue lipped, wet and miserable in Luddesdowne’s outfield, and this Saturday when we were slowly microwaved on our own ground.

Fielding first, again, we opened from the pavilion end with the returning Ed Walker. Fresh from his art show, hair streaming even further than before, Ed gave a performance that was, according to critics, somewhere between the impressionistic and surreal. It was well received by Luddesdowne’s openers and the score mounted rapidly. Change was obviously required and so we shifted from surrealism to dada. Old Father Nick proceeded to calm things down with a long, economical spell.

Meanwhile Bob Shapter bowled a few tidy overs, and then the first change at his end proved productive. Wyn’s incredibly deceptive, really slow ball struck the batsman’s pads and whilst the result of a polite lbw appeal was being deliberated Will Stanyard whipped off the bails and there was no doubt about the stumping. Nick removed Luddesdowne’s number 3 and a few overs later Wyn was indebted to Dan James for a boundary catch that removed the next man in.

A long stand then followed that was only broken by Ed’s return. Four down was all that we could manage, despite the further efforts of Bob, Ed, Jon and Chris (now figuring in the traditional, second team, one-over, strike bowler role). Luddesdowne’s early charge had been reined in but they still put together a total of 244.

Alex and Wyn opened for Shoreham, and though they set a lively pace both were soon back in the pavilion, Wyn for 6 and Alex for 14. Then came the defining partnership of the day, dominated by Will with a solid supporting role from Nick. We would have been at the George possibly half an hour earlier had Will not cleared the fence with such regularity. (Without the pre-season clearance work we would probably have run out of balls). Will took a pretty friendly Luddesdowne attack to the cleaners, finally falling when there was less than 50 to get at around three an over.

At this point Bob came out to join Nick. In a different season there would have been little tension, with wickets and overs in hand. This season – having yet to win – there was a certain frisson of anxiety around the pavilion. In the middle, Bob was at his most phlegmatic and, almost glacially, he and Nick advanced the score. Bob was quite resolute in dealing with Nick’s calling and on the one occasion when he was forced into running against his better judgement Luddesdowne obliged with some fielding that was possibly born of shared incredulity. A final boundary pushed the score to 247 with 4 overs to spare.

A very enjoyable afternoon’s cricket, played in a great spirit, finished with the right result as far as we were concerned, balancing our defeat back at the beginning of May. We look forward to meeting Luddesdowne next year.

Nick Pearce did not score in this game but would probably like a mention.

- Wyn

It was the inaugural fixture between Shoreham and Matfield Green and most of the side turned up with only 5 minutes to spare thanks to lateness, a lack of petrol and dodgy directions. Captain Barrett lost the toss and Shoreham were put into bat which very rarely happens… and we were about to be reminded why. The opening partnership of Ray Trick and Bob Sims put on 17 before Bob was bowled without scoring by the opener Wright. Wright tore through the Shoreham batting taking 5 wickets for only 14 runs including a triple wicket maiden. Ray finished on 64 and the only other telling contributions were made by Mr Extras who got 20 and Pat who got 4 and a broken toe for his troubles. Shoreham finished on 102 all out after 27.4 overs and were out fielding again before tea.

A lesser team may have been disheartened having put on such a low total but the Sunday side took it in their stride and the sprit was quite jovial in the field. Nigel Jeffrey (8-0-27-0) opened the bowling with Ray (5-0-29-2) and each did their part in keeping the run rate down as well as teaming up to dislodge opener Gilbert bowled Trick caught Jeffrey. Brad Sims was the honorary wicketkeeper for the day but had to leave the field with a suspected broken finger after a fast paced Jeffrey delivery. George Rivett (2-0-8-1) and Greg Taylor (1-0-4-0) took over proceedings and kept the rate low. Kumar (1-0-20-0) and Pat (0.3-0-4-0) finished off the innings with a flourish as Matfield Green reached the total with a good 20 overs to spare and 7 wickets in hand. However, the ground had very good links to the pub which was only a 2 minute walk away. So, the team moved to the pub to nurse their various injuries and for the 4 ducks of the day to drink from the duck cup!

NB Bob’s Duck was mentioned in the report because there was no picture of him!

- George

This is just a little like writing Goldilocks. Last week was too wet and too cold, this week was to dry and too hot… perhaps next week will be just right?

The Shoreham XI that took the field on Saturday was notable for a few combinations. At the top of the order when we came to bat were Simon Wells and Chris Brown. A look at the crumbling Shoreham archives tells me that this was at one time the established Sunday opening pair. The explanatory note saying that this was to give time for everyone else to get there from church seems frankly implausible. Simon was also one half of one of the father and son combinations on the pitch. David Melville-Jones was also making an appearance alongside his dad.

Fielding first, we kept Cudham Wyse’s run rate down with some excellent fast bowling from Alex Masson and some good line and length stuff from the captain. Alex was well suited by the dry, hard pitch but he must wish that it didn’t drop about six inches from the batting crease to the stumps: several balls missing the bails by a very small margin. Though Alex was virtually unplayable, the breakthrough came with a run-out when the batsmen chanced a second run against Jack Rivett’s arm. They payed the price as Jack speared in a huge throw from the boundary for Martin to whip off the bails.

The second wicket had to wait for Jack to take up the bowling duties and trap Cudham Wyse’s number three lbw. This proved to be a mistake as it brought Sam Merron in and from then on the tempo of the scoring increased as he plundered 94 runs, mainly from the second and third string bowlers. Without Merron’s contribution Cudham Wyse’s total would have been modest, but in the event they set us 203 to chase.

The record shows that Alex, Nick Walker, Jack and Russell (must be a dog joke there somewhere) all bowled economically and took a wicket apiece. The record however also shows that Martin bowled one over for 15 runs – no doubt because of all the byes he conceded by not being able to get behind the stumps fast enough. It also shows that Nick Pearce bowled an expensive over, but he must have been in stealth mode as no one but the scorer knew he was there. And ‘Unsure’ apparently also conceded 31 from 3 overs, but Unsure is pretty sure that he knows who he is and is also sure that he wasn’t that expensive. Anyway…

Having fielded in the heat for two and a half hours, IPL import Simon Wells then opened and spent a further two hours in the middle accumulating the 84 runs that were the backbone of our innings. Shoreham were never very far from the required rate. Simon and Chris pushed the score along steadily, but when Chris departed for 18 – with the score around 60 – there was a little wobble as first Nick and then Martin went cheaply (in fact Nick couldn’t have gone more cheaply).

Througout our innings the game remained evenly poised. Simon continued to strike the ball well, while at the other end there was a succession of cameo innings from some of Shoreham’s rising stars.: perhaps we were slight favourites, but as the final overs were played out we couldn’t accelerate to finish off the game and wickets fell steadily.

First IPA import Jack accumulated 19. Well, I say accumulated. First he slumbered like a volcano, then he struck three boundaries and then he was out. Russell followed Jack ( – still working on that dog joke, but I haven’t quite got it yet) and became the anchor for the final overs.

When Simon was finally out, and staggered from the field, Alex took his place. Alex’s innings mirrored Jack’s and he was out for 12.

With tension mounting all the time, James Anderson was eighth man in. There were around five overs still to go and around 30 runs required. James’s innings was like Jack’s and Alex’s, only less restrained. Windmilling at everything that was bowled at him he failed to trouble the scorers much, until – with the remainder of the innings being measured in balls – he finally managed to make a couple of significant contacts that each sailed to the boundary, leaving us tied, with one over remaining. The field was brought in but Russell drove the first ball to the boundary, and we had our first victory of the season.

(Can anyone help with that dog joke?)

- Wyn

This fixture is always highly anticipated in the Shoreham calendar as it is one of the oldest and friendliest rivalries we have. Each year Shoreham play the Jolly Rogers for the coveted trophy: The Dosser’s Cup in memory of Colin Boothroyd.

The match saw the triumphant return of vice captain Jack Rivett to the Sunday squad. He and Mazzon (rough translations: Masson, Maszon, Materazzi) opened the bowling for the home side and whilst Mazzon (7-0-22-0) kept the runs down J. Rivett (9-1-32-3) took the wickets. Jack’s wickets came courtesy of a tidy catch from Kumar and two very safe catches from wicket-keeper Richard Nash who kept very well for the second time this season. Ringer Samuel Trick (7-0-29-3) broke down their middle order with some beautiful off-spin. His scalps included the big hitter of L Freeman whom he caught and bowled for a very cheap 19 much to the incredulity of the batsman. Danny Setterfield (7-0-32-0) chipped in with a decent spell from the Pavilion End and an even better tea which was waiting in the wings by the time George Rivett (6-1-9-2) came on to bowl. The smell of tea wafting over the field motivated both him and Haysler (3-0-19-1). Haysler using the hill and some ripping leg spin saw number 8 lose his off stump. Greg Taylor (1-0-1-0) came on for an over at the end having earned his reputation as “Shoreham’s best fielder” as decided by the Jolly Rogers’ batsmen. A stunning bowling display had left the Jolly Rogers on 147 for 9 at tea which gave us what we thought would be a gettable total.

Haysler and Barrett opened the batting but departed fairly quickly getting 4 and 1 respectively. This brought Sam Trick and Richard Nash to the crease. Richard struck three fours before leaving on 12. Debutant Giles Winser then came to the crease after a convincing fielding performance. Giles hit a couple of convincing strokes and supported Sam at the other but ultimately was caught out without scoring. When Taylor (8) and Kumar (1) followed soon after, Shoreham seemed in dire straits at 84 for 6. Mazzon came in to steady the ship and help Sam along to his fifty. However, Sam fell on 55 bringing vice captain Rivett to the crease who only managed 4 before being bowled. Danny Setterfield once again steadied the ship but ended up caught out on 7. This brought number 11 G. Rivett to the crease with 40 to get off of 7 overs. He and Mazzon gave it a go but Mazzon played around a straight one finishing on 12 with Rivett 11 not out. Shoreham fell 28 short of the required total on 120 all out but it was down to the pub to eat too many chips and big up our respective roles in retaining the Dosser’s Cup (it is presented to the losers of the fixture).

- George